The Irrelevant Travel Plans

This blog is written mostly tongue in cheek. Some points may be informative. Please provide your feedback.
If you suffer from self-irrelevancy, please seek professional advice.

Hello. My spouse and I are planning on going on a one-day trip with another couple this summer. We are going down to Niagara Falls to play a golf course. Other than that, I know nothing.
Why? Because I'm irrelevant as far as the travel plans are concerned, because I'm irrelevant in general. I will be told whether or not we see the actual Falls, or if we go to any other attraction there. My input has not been asked for yet. I expect that to continue.
What will I say if I'm asked for input? That my spouse and my spouse's friend are planning it, and I should be thought of as livestock. That's because my spouse's friend is very close-minded and wants things done in a certain way. If I suggest something different, it will be rejected anyway. So why bother? I'll just sit back, relax and go with the flow.
As summer approaches, it's very nice as an irrelevant person to not have to think.

Regards,
Irrelevant

The Irrelevant Golf Marshall

This blog is written mostly tongue in cheek. Some points may be informative. Please provide your feedback.
If you suffer from self-irrelevancy, please seek professional advice.

Hello. I work as a golf marshall. My job is to keep play moving. If a slow group doesn't speed up after a word of encouragement, they get flagged. After two flags, they get a visit from the pro shop, where they end up being asked to leave, or skip ahead a few holes.
In an ideal world, my role would be unnecessary. As it is now, sometimes I'm irrelevant.
Why? Because slow golfers do not realize they are slow. The real bad offenders are in disbelief when told they are slow. The next stage is anger, then defiance. If a group gets to this stage, they are not going to speed up, no matter what.
It comes down to the fact that they pay their money to play, and so they feel they're entitled to play at their own pace, no matter how slow that is, and no matter how many people are waiting for them.
When groups are like this, I become an irrelevant marshall.

Regards,
Irrelevant

The Irrelevant Ownership Bid II

This blog is written mostly tongue in cheek. Some points may be informative. Please provide your feedback.
If you suffer from self-irrelevancy, please seek professional advice.

Hello. What makes Balsillie's bid irrelevant? The NHL's proven over the years (and this latest action confirms it) they don't want to expand into Canada. They feel the league will be hurt by having another Canadian team in the picture, because US teams can't market the Kitchener or Hamilton Predators.
Guess what? This argument is irrelevant right now, because they can't market teams right now anyway, if TV ratings and gate receipts are any indication. Besides, all teams don't play each other right now anyway. If the NHL wants to increase to 32 teams, that would make 8 divisions of 4 teams. Montreal, Ottawa, Toronto and Hamilton/Kitchener could be one, and Calgary, Edmonton, Vancouver and a US team (Minnesota? Colorado?) could be the other. In this setup, it would minimize Canadian teams playing in the US.
Since the NHL will reject this thinking, the only way Balsillie will become relevant is to buy an existing Canadian franchise and keep it there.

Regards,
Irrelevant

The Irrelevant Ownership Bid

This blog is written mostly tongue in cheek. Some points may be informative. Please provide your feedback.
If you suffer from self-irrelevancy, please seek professional advice.

Hello. My sympathies to Jim Balsillie for his efforts in purchasing the Nashville Predators. While his offering price of $238 million is attractive, his bid is irrelevant.
Why? Because Balsillie is interested in moving the Predators to the Southern Ontario market. After being thwarted in his Pittsburgh Penguins attempt, Balsillie has been very blunt in indicating he wants to move Nashville to Hamilton or Kitchener.
The NHL front office would be thrilled if he was staying in Nashville, or moving to KC or LAs Vegas. But another team in Southern Ontario? No way.
The other thing the NHL doesn't like about Balsillie is his forward thinking. The NHL proved once again they want to stay in the dark ages by electing Jeremy Jacobs, the Boston Bruins owner who has driven the franchise into the ground, as the Chairman of the Board of Governors. Not exactly Mr. Progressive.
It's too bad Mr. Balsillie's bid is irrelevant. Maybe he can start his own league.

Regards,
Irrelevant

The Irrelevant Start Time IV

This blog is written mostly tongue in cheek. Some points may be informative. Please provide your feedback.
If you suffer from self-irrelevancy, please seek professional advice.

Hello. So what to do if the place you're going to (in yesterday's example, the specialist's office)seems to have no regard for start times, and it's the only place you can go within reasonable distance to get the service you need? Does the saying "you can't fight city hall" apply?
Awareness is the key. Make the office aware that by not honouring your start time, they are sending you the message that you're irrelevant.
In 90+% of the cases, the office is probably unaware of the inconvenience caused by its inability to stick to a start time schedule. Even if they are aware, they may say something to the effect that they schedule appointments every half hour to meet demand, but really need one hour per patient.
At that point, you can ask them how they would feel going to a dentist for getting a tooth pull and having to wait.
Make them aware, no matter what. At that point, you are no longer irrelevant.

Regards,
Irrelevant

The Irrelevant Start Time III

This blog is written mostly tongue in cheek. Some points may be informative. Please provide your feedback.

Hello. How else can start times be made relevant? Let's use the example of waiting at a doctor's office.
If you know your 3pm appointment will probably start at 4pm, let the doctor's office know you'll be going elsewhere if it happens again. Either the doctor's office will be indifferent (meaning you're irrelevant) or they'll try to adjust (meaing you're relevant). In either case you should be a winner.
This approach can be used for any area where you're the customer. My mom uses it at her hairdresser. I use it at golf courses.
But what about if you're at a specialist's office? That person may be the only one in your area who can do anything for you. What can you do in that case?
More tomorrow.

Regards,
Irrelevant

The Irrelevant Start Time II

This blog is written mostly tongue in cheek. Some points may be informative. Please provide your feedback.
If you suffer from self-irrelevancy, please seek professional advice.

Hello. How can a start time become relevant for a meeting or appointment? There has to be an incentive for all attendees to begin on time.
In yesterday's example, where the 5th person determines start time relevancy, there has to be a reason that 5th person will attend the meeting ahead of other things. Believe it or not, one reason may be food and/or drink. If the people know there will be food (and better yet, if they know it may run out if they don't arrive on time), they'll be there, especially if the meeting is scheduled to run until around lunch time.
Another way is if the meeting scheduler realizes the 5th person is irrelevant to the meeting. If so, that person can be excluded from future meetings, which may help the start time.
Are there any other ways to make start times relevant? More tomorrow.

Regards,
Irrelevant

The Irrelevant Start Time

This blog is written mostly tongue in cheek. Some points may be informative. Please provide your feedback.
If you suffer from self-irrelevancy, please seek professional advice.

Hello. One of my dad's strongest lessons growing up was to be no later than on time for an appointment or a meeting. As a result, I became rather anal about getting to places on time. In fact I reschedule everything else around any appointment I have.
What I have found out throughout my experiences is the start time of a meeting or appointment is irrelevant.
Why? Because it's not the appointment that makes the start time relevant. It's the people attending that make the start time relevant.
For example, if 5 people are supposed to attend a meeting, and only 4 are there when the start time comes, the status of the 5th person will determine the start time relevancy. If the 5th person is relevant, the start time will be delayed. If the 5th person is irrelevant, the meeting will start immediately.
Can this be changed? More tomorrow.

Regards,
Irrelevant

The Irrelevant Overtime III

This blog is written mostly tongue in cheek. Some points may be informative. Please provide your feedback.
If you suffer from self-irrelevancy, please seek professional advice.

Hello. So, you aid your peers to work less hours, meaning they're happy. Your manager is happy because assignments are being done on time, with no overtime pay.
What can you expect for your good deed? To be let go. Why? Because you are now irrelevant.
You are in your dream world now, if you're like me. No one cares what you do at this point.
So what should you do? Whatever makes you happiest. In my case it's (in this order) looking after my kids, golf and mowing lawns. I save a lot of money by doing the first, and make money doing the other two. My time's mostly my own (I watched a lot of US Open today). And while I'm making a lot less money than I used to, I'm saving way more money, and having a much better time.
Dare to be irrelevant. It's the best decision you'll ever make.

Regards,
Irrelevant

The Irrelevant Overtime II

This blog is written mostly tongue in cheek. Some points may be informative. Please provide your feedback.
If you suffer from self-irrelevancy, please seek professional advice.

Hello. So will anyone notice you're no longer working overtime? Your manager probably will, but if you're getting your assignments done, it will not be an issue. In fact, if you're getting paid for overtime, your manager will be thankful you're no longer logging overtime.
It's your peers who will give you the most problems. Surprising huh? Why would they care more than your manager? Because they're jealous you're not stuck there with them. They may think you're getting special treatment, or not as much work.
What can you do to correct this situation? Pick your closest peer, and ask if you can help that peer with their workload. This will give you extra practice in eliminating tasks, and create an ally. If you can get this peer down to regular work hours as well, you're well on your way to an exciting new relevant career.
Take the opportunity to teach your peers a relevant technique.

Regards,
Steve

The Irrelevant Overtime

This blog is written mostly tongue in cheek. Some points may be informative. Please provide your feedback.
If you suffer from self-irrelevancy, please seek professional advice.

Hello. Do you work overtime in your job? Most people do.
Do you get paid for the overtime you work? Most people don't.
The question I have for you is why would you work overtime for free? If you do, it's irrelevant.
Why? Because in an ideal world, there would be no overtime. There would be the correct number of employees doing 8 hours of work each. If someone was ill or on vacation, it wouldn't matter because the work would still get done.
The next time you go to work, plan to leave on time. If you're asked why you're leaving so early, say you have an appointment. Then do the same thing the next day. Eventually your "after-hours absence" will no longer be noticed. Your overtime days will have become irrelevant.

Regards,
Irrelevant

The Irrelevant Grades

This blog is written mostly tongue in cheek. Some points may be informative. Please provide your feedback.
If you suffer from self-irrelevancy, please seek professional advice.

Hello. In this past Saturday's Toronto Star, there was a section called "Failure is not an option" about schools letting kids pass no matter what their grades (or even attendance) is. If they are short, they are still allowed to go to the next grade. Grades have become irrelevant.
Is this good? In a word, no. While I'm all for kids having high self-esteem, it should be built on truth, not lies. Having someone go to the next level without earning it cheapens that level. If getting a high school or post-secondary degree now is much easier, will an employer or anyone else look at it the same way as before?
It's best to tell kids they are capable of passing, then encouraging them again if they fail. Get rid of the bullying and teasing as much as possible in the classroom, so the kids are able to focus on their school work. Then they'll really earn their grades, and the grades will become relevant again.

Regards,
Irrelevant

The Irrelevant Warning

This blog is written mostly tongue in cheek. Some points may be informative. Please provide your feedback.
If you suffer from self-irrelevancy, please seek professional advice.

Hello. Ever see someone ignore a warning sign, like "No Smoking", or "No Trespassing"? It's quite common, more than I thought. And it seems these warnings are becoming more and more irrelevant.
Why? Because the person abusing the warning has no concern about being punished. To quote Sharon Stone in Basic Instinct, "What are you going to do, arrest me for smoking?".
I'm all for having the punishment fit the crime. And I'm also all for enforcing the warning signs. If a sign or any other warning is just an idle threat, no one will follow the warning.
In order to have a warning carry some clout, it must be enforced. All it takes is one enforcement to one person. Once the word gets around, the number of infractions should be much lower.
Make your warnings relevant, or don't make them at all.

Regards,
Irrelevant

The Irrelevant First Aid Training

This blog is written mostly tongue in cheek. Some points may be informative. Please provide your feedback.
If you suffer from self-irrelevancy, please seek professional advice.

Hello. I have been trained in first aid. I believe I could help someone if they had a "natural" accident (ie caused by medical condition). However, if there were a real emergency, I think my training would be irrelevant.
Why? Because of a lack of equipment, for one. If someone isn't available right away with a defibrilator and/or oxygen tank, and we're a long way from a hospital, the odds of a patient surviving are very low.
Second, a lack of time is always an issue. If you are not right with someone when they go into crisis, the odds of getting to them in time are minimal. And even if you do, you're back to the same lack of equipment problem mentioned above.
So is first aid training relevant? It's better than no first aid training, but the odds of saving someone as a result are still very low, to the point of being irrelevant.

Regards,
Irrelevant

The Irrelevant Burglar Alarm

This blog is written mostly tongue in cheek. Some points may be informative. Please provide your feedback.
If you suffer from self-irrelevancy, please seek professional advice.

Hello. Do you have an alarm system? How much do you pay a month to have it monitored? $40/month?
The truth is, paying for a monitoring system is irrelevant.
Why? Because no matter how quickly a burglar alarm is set off, it's going to take on average 8 minutes for a police car to arrive at your place. That gives the burglar plenty of time to get away, with or without anything.
To those of you who say the alarm scares the burglar away, my response is the window stickers do the same thing. If you have your stickers at the main entry points a burglar would use, that in itself is a strong deterrent. The burglar doesn't know if your monitoring system is on or off. If the burglar decides to break in after seeing the stickers, the burglar doesn't care if your monitoring system is on.
Save some money. Turn your irrelevant monitoring system off.

Regards,
Irelevant

The Irrelevant Newspaper Price

This blog is written mostly tongue in cheek. Some points may be informative. Please provide your feedback.
If you suffer from self-irrelevancy, please seek professional advice.

Hello. I'm now receiving the 2nd week of an 8 week Toronto Star promotion. They are sending it to me for free all this time. At the end of the trial, they'll ask me if I want to continue for a fee. And I'll say no.
Why? Because I can get all my Toronto Star info on the Internet. Faster. For free. So why should I pay for something that's out of date when it's printed?
A better question is why does the newspaper cost anything? Why not hand it out for free? Sure it costs money to produce one, but certainly advertising costs could cover it. In fact advertising could become more expensive because circulation would skyrocket if it was free.
So why not take away the irrelevant newspaper price? Other publications like Renter's News already are free, and their info is more substantial and less time sensitive than a daily newspaper.
Get rid of the irrelevant price, Toronto Star, and watch your profits soar.

Regards,
Irrelevant

The Irrelevant Individual Fan III

This blog is written mostly tongue in cheek. Some points may be informative. Please provide your feedback.
If you suffer from self-irrelevancy, please seek professional advice.

Hello. My apologies for not writing Thursday. I was away.
So, are you relevant as an individual fan to TV numbers? You are if you are an 18-34 year old male. Otherwise, forget it!
Why, because that's the "sports demographic" advertisers are trying to target. They feel that group is the largest that watches sports. As a result, that's who's targetted.
So what happens if you're not in that group? Too bad, you are irrelevant.
How can you become relevant? Either get a sex/age change, or own a business. It's the only way to make your sports voice matter.
If you do decide to leave the game behind (which I have done for certain sports) you may be heard in time. But right now no one will care.
Please feel free to do what you want in being a sports fan, because you are irrelevant.

Regards,
Irrelevant